Angel on the Inside
by ordinary Joe
Summary: Oh no, another 'Let's change Shinji' story. Well, hope everyone likes. Read and review. SxR pairing. Chap 2 up. Now T for mild language.
1. Lilliputian Hitcher

A/N: I do not own Evangelion. As for the story, it picks up at the beginning of Episode 13. Not exactly a new idea, but wanted to see how a small change would affect the Eva-verse. Hopefully any attitude changes made by the characters will make sense. If not, feel free to flame. If you like, please review. And any insight you can provide would be much appreciated. Thank you.

* * *

"What? You want me to take my clothes off again?"

The intercom speaker buzzed slightly before Dr. Ritsuko Akagi's voice came through again. "The next chamber is an ultra-clean room environment. Just taking a shower and changing your undergarments is insufficient."

"Why do I have to go through all this for a dumb auto-pilot test," Asuka whined. Shinji sighed inwardly and looked at Rei, who once again was staring off into space. He idly wondered what would happen first: Ayanami actually talking like a real person or Asuka actually shutting up for once. He leaned his head forward ever so slightly, hiding his grin as he decided that neither scenario had a snowball's chance in hell.

While still calm, the good doctor's voice seemed to be losing some of its patience. "With the advance of time comes the need for Eva technology to advance as well. To do so we need a constant influx of new data. Now get undressed." Shinji groaned slightly but not with Asuka's patented vehemence. Rei had answered with a simple "Yes ma'am."

What followed was a simple shower taken to extremes, in Shinji's opinion. He didn't particularly enjoy the strict regime forced on him at the moment; after all he did a very good job keeping up his hygiene, thank you very much. The water did relax him somewhat, however, even though it did nothing to calm his nerves. He still disliked the Eva and all of its incarnations. Idly he looked at his skin. The slightly pink hue of his skin reminded him vaguely of the other two times he had nearly been boiled alive: once in the fight with the fifth angel and again in rescuing Asuka from death after the eighth. He grimaced, reminded again of the pain associated with being an Eva pilot. He was jarred from his reverie by the door of his 'cell' sliding open and quickly covered himself.

"Alright, I'm here. Just the way you wanted: butt naked and run through the wash cycle seventeen times."

"Very good. And I want all three of you to stay that way as you walk through the room and board the entry plug."

_Aw crap,_ Shinji thought. As much as he disliked the idea of walking through the hallway in his birthday suit, he was both intrigued and horrified at the thought of the great Second Child doing the same. _She'll no doubt have something to say about walking naked around a pervert, though she's already done it a few times when she's forgotten a towel._ That thought almost made Shinji smile, but that was before Asuka opened her mouth.

"What!"

"Don't worry. The video recorders have been shut off. We do respect your privacy."

"Oh, sure you do. And that's not the point! This is a personal thing!"

_Well, at least she didn't mention me._ Shinji quietly sighed with relief.

"The purpose of this experiment is to monitor the harmonics directly from your bodies without the interference of you plugsuits."

Another voice came through the speaker. "Asuka, this is an order."

"Alright, but I don't want anyone peeking, Okay?" The camera at the far end of the hall winked off with an audible _beep_. Asuka turned to him. "And that includes you, Third Child."

"Asuka, how am I supposed to get into my plug without being able to see?"

"Does it look like I care? It doesn't matter to me but you are not getting a free show of this glorious body of mine." She held her fist up threateningly. "Remember the 'Over the Rainbow.'"

He didn't think he could forget if he tried. Still, the memory wasn't all bad. But this left him with the slight problem of how to make it to his plug. He closed his eyes and placed one hand in front of him, the other still preserving his modesty.

"Satisfied?"

"Yeah, yeah, just make sure you don't touch me or anything, pervert." With that the three made their way across the room. Whether by fate or just a subconscious desire to escape Asuka's wrath, Shinji accidentally bumped into his other counterpart. While Asuka went into a rant about how perverted he was for rubbing up on her body with his (_I barely hit her shoulder with mine!_), Rei did the most unexpected, yet expressive, thing. While Shinji was still stammering out an apology, she gently grasped his outstretched hand and led him to his plug before entering her own. That simple act stunned the Second Child until she realized that she stood alone in the room, naked, with her mouth agape.

* * *

The test seamed to be going fine until something happened. He heard it. _Was that a scream?_ Shinji thought, _Rei!_ A moment later Dr. Akagi echoed his last thought. He felt a tremor through his seat as something heavy slammed into the wall where his simulation body was attached.

"Rei's simulation body, it's moving!"

"Impossible," came Ritsuko's reply.

"The corrosion is still spreading! It's invading the simulation bodies' active water system." A discoloration began to appear on the shoulder of Rei's simulation body. Unnoticed by the bridge crew, however, other small streams of similar particles were traveling down the pipes connecting to the two remaining bodies. An arm reached out to the control station and was quickly separated. The whole time the other particles were racing down the pipes, finally making contact with the two bodies.

Misato turned to her long-time friend. "How's Rei?"

"She's alright. Eject the entry plugs! Use the lasers!" Shinji felt himself rocket upwards. Whether it was from the force of hitting his head or what, he wasn't sure, but he saw a bright flash. Then there was only blackness.

Inside the simulation plug for unit 01 a rather strange occurrence could have been witnessed. A red glow began emitting from just behind the pilot's head. Slowly the glow began to absorb him, the glow changing from a menacing red to a more serene golden color. Soon Shinji's entire body was enveloped in its glow. After a moment only the Third Child was glowing as the symbiotic angel began to leave the remnants of the plug for its organic host. As the glow began to fade, other changes were developing. First his musculature, never very pronounced, began to ever so slightly bulk on his frail frame. His skin lightened noticeably too, though not by a drastic amount. Finally, as the groggy boy came around, light golden flecks appeared in his eyes, though they faded after a moment. These changes went unnoticed by the organism himself, indeed, one had to look for the changes at all, but they were there and evident. Indeed, anyone could see the changes. And soon, everyone would.

* * *

"What's going on out there?" The entire angel attack had gone by without the pilots having any knowledge past their ejection. Feeling lost and dejected at having been forgotten, nevertheless Shinji was grateful that the recycler for his LCL was still functional. That and there were no communications with the Second Child. He hoped she, and Rei, were alright, but it was nice not having to listen to her incessant complaining for a change. He did like Asuka, on a myriad, of ways, but she never treated him like anything more than a disposable utensil. Something to be used and discarded, nothing more. Still he was used to it and had figured if not her, then it would be abuse from someone else. So he sat back and waited, trying to entertain himself until his retrieval.

He didn't know how long he sat there staring blankly into space before his plug began to jostle with movement. Thrown around violently, he found himself nearly upside down in the cockpit. "Would someone pay attention out there!" He knewyelling was likely pointless but he didn't care. Two more revolutions of his plug and Shinji was thoroughly upset, not to mention disoriented. Finally he was thrown against the control console as the plug was hoisted upwards by its backwards end. Standing more or less in the stirrups Shinji was able to relieve the stress on his chest and rubbed his aching sternum. He was rocked back into the seat as the capsule was oriented properly again. Shaking his head to himself, he waited until the hatch was released. The LCL rushed out of the plug and he leaned forward, expelling the last remnants from his lungs. He took a deep breath, relishing the taste of real air again and enjoying the lack of strain on his lungs. For the moment he even forgot about being stark naked as he sat in the plug. Presently a face interrupted his moment of peace.

"Hey Shinji." Shocked, Shinji moved to cover himself. The predator-like grin on one Major Misato Katsuragi promised nothing but good natured torment.

"Misato!" Shinji was quickly turning from pink to crimson. "Do you mind handing me a towel or something?" The major's grin only widened.

"Why? Red is a good look on you!" Shinji decided not to devote any brainpower to analyze the statement as she left to retrieve him a towel. Shinji was only alone a moment before a towel was handed back to him. Misato stood there, still grinning like a Cheshire cat.

Only mildly annoyed the boy spoke. "Misato, do you mind?"

"Not at all," came the cheerful replays she leaned her shoulder against the opening, the grin ever-present on her face.

"Misato!" In a mock huff the purple haired woman finally stepped away.

"Anyway, it's not like you didn't bear it all the first night you were in my apartment!" A groan escaped the cockpit and her grin widened. Inside Shinji had turned the color of unit 02 at the memory. He shook the thought off, finally coming up with a retort.

"Well at least it's not as bad as the alleged 'clothes' you wear to breakfast every morning." Inquisitive rescuers turned to see a rapidly growing blush on the major's face. Shinji heard her start to give out orders in an authoritative tone as she moved away. Finally left alone to extract himself from the plug, he smiled. _Gotcha!_ He managed to get out of the plug and still maintain a modicum of decency. The berating of a certain redhead greeted his ears, leaving Shinji with the impression that he was just as well off inside the plug.

"I can't believe this Misato! Do you have any idea how long I was stuck in there?" Their mutual guardian began to sound a bit perturbed.

"Actually we don't Asuka, since it was kind of a priority to defeat the angel first." She finished with a look that effectively ended the conversation. There was a small _screech_ as the cable pulling the First Child's plug strained in the hoist. Shinji, Misato and Asukacould only watch as techs maneuvered the plug and oriented it properly as it came to rest on the deck. Dr. Akagi opened the door and handed the figure inside a towel. As Rei emerged, Shinji couldn't take his eyes off of her. Something was different about her but he couldn't put his finger on it. He could see her, but it was as if he could _feel_ her as well. He could feel her presence. She got out of her plug and looked at him, her head canted in an uncertain expression. _This is weird._

"What's the matter Shinji? You haven't looked at Rei like that since Ritsuko gave you her id card. Do you like what you see?" Misato had appeared with a bathrobe for him but had noticed his stare. He reddened and glared at his superior. She merely gave him another evil grin and made her way to where Asuka was sulking with another robe. He looked back over at Rei, who was now also in a bathrobe, and found that she was still staring at him. _I wonder . . ._ Shinji made his way over to where Rei was standing.

"Are you Okay Ayanami? Did something happen back there?" His voice showed genuine concern. He searched her eyes for some obvious sign of her discomfort, but she remained as unreadable as always. So he justslumped his back against her plug, watching her watch him. It was a moment before she finally answered.

"I am acceptable. However I do not have any knowledge of the passing beyond our ejection from the test bodies. It would seem that there was an angel attack."

Shinji shook his head. "No. I mean did something happen to _you_?" Rei seemed to consider this for a moment.

"No, I do not believe anything unusual has occurred to me." She looked deep into his eyes, as if searching for something. "Has something happened to you?" Asked innocently enough, the question was still loaded to Shinji. He resisted the urge to say 'no' on impulse. After all, his head did hurt slightly. He subconsciously ran his hand along the back of his head, feeling both a small knot and trickle of blood. He looked at his hand slightly puzzled, but then felt the First Child's eyes on his hand as well. He smiled.

"It's nothing," he said. "Just a slight bump on the head." He attempted to smile again but was slightly unnerved as she took his hand gently again for the second time that day. She looked closely at the blood. _Odd, wouldn't most people check the wound?_ Shinji was about to say as much until Rei looked into his eyes. All thought left him as he was momentarily lost in her eyes. Then the moment ended to the tune of a very irate Asuka Langley Sohryu.

"What are you two up to," she asked accusingly. "Holding hands even? I guess the pervert couldn't keep his hands to himself with us all being indecent." She glared at the Third Child. Shinji couldn't remember the last time Asuka had made him so furious. But his was not the voice that countered Asuka berating him.

"Ikari was wounded in the ejection and forcible escape." She held up his hand as evidence of the fact. Asuka merely shrugged.

"So the idiot bumped his head. Only _he_ could manage to hurt himself on a cushioned chair." She tossed her hair over her shoulder and walked away, the conversation over. Rei stared after Asuka before turning her attention back towards Shinji. Hesmiled a small smileagain already content with being ignored by his tormenter. He sheepishly rubbed the back of his head with his other hand as Rei regarded him again.

"Umm, Ayanami, can I have my hand back now?" Looking down at the hand she now held, Rei gradually released her grip on him. He pulled his other hand from behind his head and glanced at it. "See, it's already stopped bleeding. Nothing to worry about, Okay?" He left her with a timid smile as he debarked the boat and left for the remainder ofthe day. She could only watch as he walked away, the slightest trace of concern etched on her face.


	2. Weaving a Story

A/N: Sorry this took so long to put up. I don't own Evangelion (other than a nice DVD set). Hope there's still one or two people out there that still want to read this odd duck I'm posting. A very big thank you to all my reviewers (you were my inspiration for this all-nighter lol).

* * *

Shinji stood in the men's locker room, holding his plugsuit in his hands going over in his mind what Dr. Akagi had said. 

flashback>

"Today will be the first interchangeability test between the Evangelions. For this test we have chosen Units 00 and 01. Ayanami will be tested first in Unit 01; Shinji, you will be second in Unit 00. The main purpose of this test is to see if, in an emergency situation, the pilot staff could be switched based on availability of operating Evas. So far it hasn't been a problem but we would rather be safe than sorry." Ritsuko looked back at her clipboard, neglecting to mention the 'other' reason: to see if Rei, or more accurately, the dummy plug system, would remain a viable option. Since its inception, Ritsuko was growing to dislike the clones more and more, with Rei bearing the brunt of it. "Any questions?"

The three children looked at her with varying reactions. They all knew what she meant by 'availability'; it wasn't just the Evas that might be casualties in a battle.

"Well, it's not like you have to worry about my Unit 02 anyways. It'll always be fine and I'll always be there to pilot it." She folded her arms across her chest and looked away with slight disgust. _How dare they even think such a thing about me!_

"I'm sure you'll all be just fine and we'll never have to worry about this, but it's just a precaution," Misato said with a smile

Shinji looked at the colorful headed females a moment, hoping they were right. He looked back at Rei, recalling her state the first time he had seen her. _And that was before there was even a battle._ And then she had almost given her life for him in the fight with the fifth. Shinji looked to the ground, his mood dour as he remembered his own time in the hospital

Rei merely continued to look at the doctor, as though oblivious to the other two pilots. She knew the true reason for the tests and could be replaced with minimal effort; ergo there was no concern for her well-being. _That is not true; Commander Ikari cares._ She saw his face; remembered his concern after the failed activation experiment. _But does Ikari not care also? Has he not done the same?_ That memory, too, played unbidden in her mind. Afterwards he had merely asked for a smile, a token gesture, and was happy and satisfied with her well-being when rewarded with one. The conversation on the boat replayed in her mind as well. Then her slap when he said those things about the commander. She felt . . . something new. _Discomfort._ Rei knew that wasn't it, but that was the only emotion she had to relate to. She would have to find out more about this new emotion in order to understand it and, consequently, avoid it.

Shinji had once again turned to Rei, his eyes trying to meet hers, but she pointedly looked away as she walked from the room. _Is Ayanami upset with me?_ He wasn't sure but he pondered that, staring at the ground as he felt her presence fade from the room. He still didn't understand why he could _feel_ her, but he doubted he could figure it out on his own. He would need Rei's help. And that would mean talking to her.

end>

Shinji pulled the plugsuit on over his shoulders until it rested comfortably. He grimaced to himself, wondering how one could be comfortable in a skintight rubber suit. It barely did anything but preserve his modesty but certainly left nothing to the imagination. _And Asuka thinks _I _am a pervert!_ He sighed, clicking the wrist button that would shrink the suit. He noted the time before he shut his locker. _Ayanami should be about done_. After the way she had avoided him earlier, he didn't want to push his luck, so he had purposefully stayed in the locker room the extra time. As he walked out the door he nearly hit Misato with it. His cheeks burned as he apologized.

"I'm sorry, Misato. I didn't see you there." His eyebrow raised. "What _were_ you doing outside the men's locker room?" She easily brushed him off.

"Oh Shinji don't start. I came here to get you anyway. Question is," her eyebrow raised and she used a mock accusing tone, "what were you doing that would take you so long in the first place? Nothing dirty I hope." She winked at him and he blushed fiercely.

"Misato! Stop that!" He brushed past her and went to shove his hands in his pockets, forgetting for a moment that there were none to be had. He noticed what he was doing when she chuckled at him.

"Calm down Shinji. No need to get mad." They walked a ways before she took on a concerned tone. "So why did it take you so long?"

"I was just letting Ayanami go ahead so that she wouldn't have to deal with me. You saw her at the briefing," he said dejectedly.

"Yeah, I saw that. Not like the other day at all. Did something happen at school?" Shinji shook his head.

"No, and she hasn't said more than a few words to me there, either. But. . ." He trailed off.

"But?"

Shinji grinned sheepishly. "Well, sometimes I have caught her looking at me."

His guardian beamed. "My Shinji, a lady-killer! And Rei Ayanami, no less!"

He rolled his eyes. "Not like that. Like she was trying to study me, or figure something out."

"Or maybe she was trying to picture you naked!" She ran on ahead of him easily, since her comment had stopped him in his tracks. Then she heard him.

"Misato!"

The door to the control booth opened for her and Misato joined Ritsuko and Maya inside. She walked to the observation window and crossed her arms. As she listened to the technical jargon, she idly wondered what the First Child was thinking. And what, if anything, it had to do with Shinji. She looked over at the console as the doctor spoke.

"So Rei, how does it feel to be piloting Unit 01 for the first time?"

"It smells like Ikari." That comment caused Misato's brow to knit in confusion.

"The sync ratio is almost the same as with Unit 00."

"Unit 00 and Unit 01's personal data patterns are almost identical."

"That's what makes this sync experiment possible." Misato turned back to the visage of Unit 01, occasionally glancing back at the doctor and the tech.

"Error margin is 0.03. Harmonics are normal."

"No detectable problems found for compatibility between Rei and Unit 01. Okay, the test is over Rei. You can get out now."

"Yes." The single word was all that was heard over the speaker. The familiar cascade of colors greeted her as the connections were broken and that was when she noticed it. Or rather, the lack of it. She was always acutely aware of the entity inside Terminal Dogma. She always felt it inside her Eva. This time was no different. She felt the room, the one of her. She also felt the other presence, the one she felt when she was inside Commander Ikari's office. But she also felt one more, the first time she had felt this one inside an Eva. She knew the base layout and could place an approximate location as to the new entity's whereabouts. Weak as it was, she was already sure what, no, _who_ the entity was. And here she sat, inside the plug that smelled of him, inside an almost direct link to his mind. She thought about her ability to sense him, wondering if he could sense her as well. She had not yet asked him, instead pondering why Commander Ikari had not informed her of the younger Ikari's addition to the Instrumentality Project. _Are not myself and my clones enough?_ This brought a new thought to mind: her clones. _Will Ikari be able to sense them as well?_ If he had been adopted into the Instrumentality Project, he surely knew about them already. Still, this thought made her feel discomfort in much the same fashion as the earlier briefing. So caught up in her thoughts, Rei barely registered the ejection of the plug into the locking cradle. She decided that she would finally talk to Ikari about this, since the Commander had yet to inform her and seemed to take progressively less and less interest in her. She skipped her shower and departed for the observation control room.

From inside Unit 00's entry plug, Shinji could hear everything.

"Unit 02 databank completed."

"Harmonics are all normal."

"Pilot's status is normal."

"'Course I'm normal," Asuka muttered. _At least I'm normal compared to the First and Third Children!_ It was undeniable that a part of her felt slighted at not also having to take part in the interchangeability test. Sure they weren't as great as her Unit 02, but maybe she would find some sort of connection to their pilots. . . That thought brought Asuka's wandering mind to a screeching halt. A frustrated glare attached itself to her face. _I _don't _need anyone, and least of all _those _two!_

"What about Unit 00's personal data?"

"Already reconfigured. Reconfirming data now."

"Subject's status?"

"A bit jittery, but no problems found in the nerve patterns."

"This is his first time in Unit 00. His first time piloting another Eva. It's only natural."

"That's stupid. Why should he care which Eva he's in anyway?" Yet even as she said that Asuka knew it would take a direct order, or an act of God, to get her out of her Eva and into another one. Unit 02 was _hers_, regardless of what the U. N., NERV, or anyone else for that matter said.

"It makes a difference to Shinji. That's just how he is."

"I know that," Asuka bit angrily. _I can't possibly have anything in common with _him "He's such a dork." Then her mind began to wander back along its earlier track; that being curious about her own interchangeability test. "So why aren't you running these compatibility tests on me? Is there something wrong with me?" _Oh God please, don't let that be the case!_

Misato hadn't expected this. _Shit! After earlier I had hoped she wouldn't even think about it, let alone ask._ Quickly she thought of an excuse that would appease Asuka and diffuse the situation. "Well, we didn't think you'd want to pilot any Eva except yours."

"Yeah, that's true isn't it?" _I don't even know if Unit 02 would even be compatible._ With the red-headed time-bomb thus sated, Misato focused her concern back on Shinji. The reports of the Unit's failed activation test filled her mind and she couldn't bear the thought of something else happening to the boy she had come to care for, not to mention her best pilot.

"Beginning entry."

"LCL electrolyzed."

"Commence first connections."

"Shinji, how do you feel in Unit 00's entry plug?

"It feels kinda weird."

"Like incompatibility?"

"Not like that. This thing smells like Rei." _It feels like her too._ Shinji thought about that for a second. The feeling was weak and even now it was fading, like a handprint on a cold pane of glass. But it was there nonetheless. _What does it mean?_

"It smells like _what_? _Perverse mensche!_"

"Data received. Reconfirming. Pattern green."

"All restraints are nominal."

"Acknowledged. Now let's shift the mutual compatibility test to the second stage."

"Unit 00 entering second contact."

"How's it look?"

"As I thought. The sync ratio is lower than that of Unit 01."

"Hmmm. Harmonics are all normal."

"But these are still good readings. These numbers mean that we can implement our current plan.

"You mean the Dummy System. Ma'am, I'm really not sure that we should proceed.

"I understand your feelings on this, but we always have to be prepared for all options. It's our guarantee of survival."

"You know that I've always respected you ma'am and I still believe in our work. But I'm afraid I'm really not convinced . . ."

"People who develop too many scruples will always have some difficulty working amongst others. You'll learn once you've gotten your hands dirty. You'll see."

"Initiating third connection."

"Cell state of mind graph is stable." _Can't we just hurry up?_ Shinji sat with his eyes closed, waiting for the connection. He couldn't even remember his first activation taking this long. _Well, at least no one is bothering . . ._ His communications window activated. He didn't even have to look up to see who it was. _Screw that thought._

"Is Shinji missing momma's breast? Is it like being in her womb or what?" As much as he liked the Second Child, she could hurt him in the worst ways. His composure was gone in an instant and though he didn't really move, he slumped a bit more in his seat. He said nothing in response, hoping that was the right course of action.

"Asuka, stop interrupting. You're being obnoxious."

"Yeah, yeah. I don't get it: why does everyone around here always pamper him?" Shinji opened his eyes, trying to regain his thoughts, but he was unable to push Asuka from his mind. Her striking looks and, on the extremely rare occasion, considerate deeds or comments stood at striking contrast to her abrasive personality and near-constant assaults.

"Commence A10 nerve connection."

"Harmonics level plus twenty."

Sidetracked as Shinji was, he never had a chance. When the neural connectors activated, his mind was blind sided by a freight train of images and feelings. He could barely register an image or feeling before it was torn away from his mind, instantly replaced by another. Confused as he was, he clutched at his forehead in a vain attempt to quell the riotous thoughts that maddened him. "What the hell? Something's trying to get into my brain." As the colossal wave of information assaulted him he lost more and more of his fragile grip on his senses. Finally in desperation he reached out for something, anything that could connect the scattered thoughts. "Rei?" The images and feelings seemed to slow in their torrent. "Rei Ayanami?" Finally a scene played out in his head long enough for him to gain some of his internal bearings. "This feeling, impression. Rei, it's hers!" _The feeling._ He latched onto that as his mind became a whirlwind of activity again. Everything concerning the First Child, what he knew, along with some things he could only guess later were her memories, screamed through his mind. Left unchecked, Unit 00 began to go mad while simultaneously rejecting its new pilot. The crazed behemoth started to pull at the restraints that anchored it in place.

"What's happening?"

"There's a problem in the pilot's nerve pulse."

"Mental contamination's starting!"

"Impossible! This can't happen at this plug depth."

"It's not from the plug. The intrusion is coming from the Eva!"

Straining with uncontrolled might, Unit 00 roared in frustration and pain. Shinji could feel the giant's discord as he was rocked violently inside. He knew he had to stop the machine but had no idea how. He clung tighter and tighter to the feeling of Rei Ayanami, trying to make some sense of it all. The Eva continued its struggle, finally rewarded with freedom as it pulled from its restraints.

"Unit 00 is out of control!" The crazed beast began mimicking its pilot, clutching at its head in anguish.

"Shut all circuits! Cut the power!" Shinji barely registered a shudder through the Evangelion as the power cable separated.

"Eva has switched to reserve power."

"Eva is still activated."

"Shinji's status?"

"The circuit is closed. We can't monitor him."

"Unit 00 is rejecting Shinji."

"Negative. The auto-ejection. It doesn't work!"

"The same error. The same one. Is it trying to absorb Shinji?"

The feeling of Rei was all Shinji could focus on. And then he realized it. He felt _her_. Her presence. The feel that accompanied her whenever she was near. He could place her, tell where she was at. He looked up, surprised to see Rei standing at the window, impassively viewing his plight. _Rei?_ His mind pleaded. The Eva, responding to the focus of his thoughts, drew back a fist. He focused on her presence, finding comfort in the familiarity there. He looked at her harder, mentally holding onto her. The crushing onslaught of thought slowed, then began to lift. The massive form let its fist fly, hurtling towards the control room. A calm washed over him and the oppressive thoughts stopped altogether. Shinji dropped his hand back to his grip, revealing both eyes to be an eerily familiar shade of crimson. _Rei._ The enormous fist suddenly stopped, halting a scant three meters from the observation window. So far away, it still filled the view. A collective sharp inhale was heard from the control room staff.

"The Eva . . ," Dr. Akagi didn't even dare finish the statement. Her gaze shifted from displays that told her what her eyes were clearly seeing was impossible. "This can't be . . . happening."

Misato shook her head and turned to the comm. "Shinji?"

"Ma'am, he still can't hear you. We haven't regained control; the circuit is still closed."

"Fix it! I want the pilot out of there as soon as possible!"

"Yes ma'am!"

Ritsuko turned to Maya. "Reconnect with the Eva, then run a full diagnostic on all the equipment. I want to find out what happened."

"Yes ma'am."

Rei stood motionless and unflinching before the window. She was unsure of what had transpired. Obviously The Unit had gone rogue, but the Third Child had been able to control it. _How?_ She had no answer. _Was he protecting me? Why?_ Though it went unnoticed, there was the faintest of blushes upon the First Child's visage, accompanied by a pleasant sensation. Consciously Rei was fully aware that had he not, had something happened to her, she was replaceable. _But perhaps it is that Ikari values me somehow?_ This thought was accompanied by yet more warm thoughts. Rei decided that she now had yet one more question for the pilot when he returned.

Inside the plug, Shinji found himself calm and serene; better than he had felt in a long time. As he relaxed, his consciousness grew. Suddenly a new _feeling_ emerged, a new presence. With it came something else: a yearning. An odd longing, as though he felt incomplete, unfulfilled. It was barely there and he could easily ignore it, but he was very aware of it nonetheless. He compared it to the presence of Rei and found it to be almost nothing alike. He was about to try and contact Dr. Akagi when he felt a new presence. It was strange: it felt like numerous different presence, but he wasn't sure. Since he knew next to nothing of this strange new sense he really had no way of knowing, though this new presence had no incompleteness or longing to it at all on his part. He compared it to the other presences. To the one that was not Rei it again felt dissimilar. But too Rei on the other hand . . . He couldn't be sure but it felt as though it was material cut from the same bolt of cloth. The shape was admittedly different but the similarities were undeniable. He was in the process of trying to discern more about it when he felt it.

It hit him like a ton of bricks. The _longing_. It made his very soul ache to feel it and not to be with it. And yet even as he felt it a part of him instantly turned away from it. He turned towards it and Unit 00 responded, both pilot and Eva looking to the left and downward. He felt compelled to go to it, as though he had once been a part of it and then severed. The ache was mournful and overwhelming. Still, part of him began to close itself off, refusing to heed the call. His mind became a battleground as the yearning and the refusal made war on each other. He could neither heed the call nor refuse it. His mind felt brittle as glass and seemed threatening to split apart at the seams. The clutched his head with both hands and screamed. The silent being encompassing came alive again well and truly crazed. The Eva screamed with him and began to furiously beat its head against the wall. With each blow Shinji could feel the pain sear across the battle line of his mind as though the Eva would truly separate his mind for him.

"Oh God! It's happening again!" Misato tore her gaze from the window. "Get Shinji out of there _now_!" She turned back to the blue figure, Hyuga's reply already lost in the resounding noise echoing through the room.

"This can't possibly be! How could it go berserk, stop, then suddenly go berserk _again_? Are you getting all of this Lieutenant?" Only a grim nod was Maya's reply as her fingers flew across the keys, her gaze shifting from the screens to the window and back.

"Activation will terminate in five seconds . . . four . . . three." Shinji could feel the pain intensify and expand like a fissure inside his head. The pounding increased and he curled, seeking some kind of recourse. The pain became unbearable and he finally lost consciousness. "Two." The Eva continued pounding away on auto-pilot, the last feelings still firmly embedded within it. "One . . . zero." The Unit, its head resting against the dented wall, crumpled there. It sagged there, its arms hanging limply at its sides.

"00 activation terminated."

"Hurry up and get the pilot out of there!" _What happened in there Shinji?_

"Do you think that this could be related to the incident that occurred when Rei was the pilot?"

"I can't tell you much right now. The only thing I'm sure of is that we must reconfigure Unit 00 for Rei's personal data and run a new synchronization test between Rei and the 00. Along with that we have to analyze the data from this test to find out what precisely happened."

"As the director of operations, I request that it be done as soon as possible. _Before_ there are further problems."

"I understand that, Major Katsuragi."

"Hmmm. Right."

Shinji's blue eyes bolted open with a start. He gradually sat up, trying to sort out the last moments of the activation through the fog in his head. After a moment he finally gave up and lay back in bed. Resigning himself to asking someone if nothing became clear, an unbidden image of Rei Ayanami came to mind. Her fearless form standing in the window, totally impassive . . . _with a small blush?_ The absurdity of such a thought struck him and he almost wanted to laugh. Still, the thought lingered a moment before fading. He stared at the ceiling for a long moment. "Again? I hate this ceiling."

A blank look of determination was all that Rei wore on her face as she moved through Central Dogma towards where Lilith waited. As she carried the Lance she pondered her meeting with the commander. He was unsurprisingly distant, though he asked her many questions about her status. Most pertained to the scenario though and he allowed her no questions of her own. _I would never question my orders. I sought only to clarify my place in the scenario._ She settled upon her previous decision and reaffirmed that she would ask the Third Child when he awoke. She arrived in the room and momentarily closed her eyes. The sight never bothered her, but so caught up in thought she neglected to steel herself against the yearning, the call. It was only a moment, however and she stood poised to insert the Lance into the Angel. _So many questions to answer._ As the Lance found its mark, something else occurred. Though he could never have seen it, the barest trace of a smile was offered up to the young Ikari once again.


End file.
